Tuesday, March 05, 2019

Baby Girl

Motherhood is very special.
If we are fortunate, it is a tender bond that we have experienced personally. For Christine, the bond spans a wide spectrum depending on if you look at her mom or her daughter. She writes… 

My bum tattoo was done when I was 18. It is a special tribute to my adoptive mom. My real mom had me when she was only 16. She was in an abusive relationship and ran away to have me, her baby. Understanding her situation, she decided to give me up for adoption. My real mom knew she could never give me a proper life and she never even named me. 

The lovely women who raised me worked at the hospital where I was born. While she got to hold me right away, she had to file the necessary papers and get me officially named so for 4 months I was just “Baby Girl”. 

Tattoos were frowned upon by my dad, so I got it on my bum so he would not see it.  On Christmas Day when I was 23 I got a key chain with the words “baby girl”. We finally told dad and he just laughed. I thought you were sitting and driving funny for a while.  

With my background, having a child was of course very dear to me. Unfortunately, due an earlier surgery doctors told me I’d never have my own child.  Always sad on Mother’s days and when I saw mothers in the malls, I wondered if perhaps prior relationships might have worked if she’d tried harder. Still I kept trying. I spent 10 long years trying and had given up. There was an emptiness I wanted to fill.  Suddenly I found I was pregnant. 

At first, I was both surprised and angry – I felt lied to. I could get pregnant.

It was however a terrible pregnancy. I had to have 9 weeks of bed rest, plus constant IV for the baby.  My water broke at 27 weeks “Lyra Jean” was born quite premature. The hospital was amazing and helped pull her through.   

Looking back, is a joy. I had my miracle and was officially a mom. 

While some other women might be jealous, I sort of lamented my luck. 

You see, I had no Tiger Stripes, never had stretch marks, no lasting scars.   So, I scared myself … and got the tattoo “Lyra Jean” on my ribs. It’s not just another tattoo, but a proud symbol of my daughter, my own pride and joy. 

A story gone full circle.

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