Monday, July 06, 2020

Eternal flame, Redeeming Rose


Danny’s tattoos, like many, tell a significant story of personal struggle.  This struggle is in the mind and while it may not always be visible to others, for Danny it is very real.

As we discussed his own Tattoo Tale, he revealed …

The skull on my arm is engulfed in flames and represents my battle with mental illness. This is the terrible part of me, the one that lives hidden inside and constantly wants to take control of my head and my mind. This is the part of me that represents my bad side.

I was diagnosed 4 years ago with a borderline personality disorder.  It affected me deeply. I often feel undesirable and less than “normal”.  Because of this illness I often see myself as damaged goods, broken and  unwanted … something no one else could really accept.   
 

I had to work a lot on myself to control the disorder. The tattoo represents the burning hate I feel towards the parts of me that are “bad” and undesirable. Every day, I have to fight against negative thoughts and control them. It is a huge challenge but with a lot of time and effort, we are getting there.
I fight constantly against this monster inside me. The tattoo is like an eternal flame. It reminds me to never give up!

The family name represents the importance that I bring to the family, but more significant is the arrow that represents my proud Native American origins.

My heritage is very important to me. I really love many key values of the First Nations, which include living in harmony and a respect for nature. My people have suffered a lot in the last centuries and still suffer today. This tattoo is a sign of respect for them to show that I think of them and my origins.

The tattoo on the back of my hand has a rose backdrop that represents the person who has helped me turn my life around.  A rose symbolizes beauty like the beautiful moments with my girlfriend.  This lady came into my life and turned it upside down in a good way.  Thanks to her I became someone better.  She gave me the strength to move forward and she continues to help me. This person came into my world and made me live a life with many more positive emotions!   

Good days or bad days, she accepts me and has showed me that life could be beautiful and magnificent even if it is not 100% perfect.   She has changed me for the better! She guides me and helps me to be a better person and I could never thank her enough. No matter what happens, she will always have a place in my heart.

I know I am not alone with mental illness and internal struggles. If I have any advice, it's to remind others that there always dark times in every life. We need to weather these storms even when they seem eternal and refuse to go away.  Please, do not let these thoughts and illness control you; keeping you from achieving your dreams.  Ride out the storms with hope and determination. Allow others in to help and little by little calmer shores will appear on the horizon.